I don't know here. Breaking your foot, no matter if it was her fault or what the hell, calls for nurturing kindness from the partner. You are still the partner. You should have hugged her and kissed her and told her your are sorry she broke her foot. It probably hurt a lot.
“Still the partner” until the government decides you’re not. That partnership ended naturally long ago and while there’s no need to be deliberately callous, it’s also wrong to act insincerely rather than just being your authentic self.
THAT would not have worked. It would be safer by far for me to squeeze and kiss a complete stranger. While I knew she did I something bad to it, neither of us knew it was broken until we got home.
Another thing that probably factored into my response though it was not a conscious thought until after I sent my last reply but I am sure is now a part of my inner logic is how she treats me in the rare instances that I am sick or injured. She receives warmer and gentler treatment from me with her broken foot than I did from her with my wrecked knee. Years ago now, as The Kid and I were preparing to go to daycare, I was struck down with a kidney stone. I suddenly felt unwell shortly after rising but still functional until it hit. Writhing in pain on the floor, my sweet wife’s only concern as evidenced from her anger laden question was “I guess this means I have to take the kid to daycare!?!”. Unable to speak, I could only nod.
She has also been playing the game of the more she tells me I have to do more around the house, the less she allows me to do. She has been unhappy for a long time and every attempt I have made to make her happy has failed utterly. She doesn’t even want me trying.
She is going to have a hell of a wake up call the very first night I am gone. It will be she who will have to stay up until 1:30 or even as late as 3 am doing the dishes. You can’t do the dishes until they are dirtied and three nights a week dinner starts around ten pm when the Kid returns from cram school. Can’t do dishes while someone is in the shower or bath as you’ll rob them of hot water so I can’t even begin to do dishes until after midnight. She’s about to discover just how “little” I do around the house.
I would have except for the kids. Then, after this there were wonderful times as a family again, so I held on to the hope we could right the capsizing ship that was our relationship.
I don't know here. Breaking your foot, no matter if it was her fault or what the hell, calls for nurturing kindness from the partner. You are still the partner. You should have hugged her and kissed her and told her your are sorry she broke her foot. It probably hurt a lot.
“Still the partner” until the government decides you’re not. That partnership ended naturally long ago and while there’s no need to be deliberately callous, it’s also wrong to act insincerely rather than just being your authentic self.
THAT would not have worked. It would be safer by far for me to squeeze and kiss a complete stranger. While I knew she did I something bad to it, neither of us knew it was broken until we got home.
Another thing that probably factored into my response though it was not a conscious thought until after I sent my last reply but I am sure is now a part of my inner logic is how she treats me in the rare instances that I am sick or injured. She receives warmer and gentler treatment from me with her broken foot than I did from her with my wrecked knee. Years ago now, as The Kid and I were preparing to go to daycare, I was struck down with a kidney stone. I suddenly felt unwell shortly after rising but still functional until it hit. Writhing in pain on the floor, my sweet wife’s only concern as evidenced from her anger laden question was “I guess this means I have to take the kid to daycare!?!”. Unable to speak, I could only nod.
She has also been playing the game of the more she tells me I have to do more around the house, the less she allows me to do. She has been unhappy for a long time and every attempt I have made to make her happy has failed utterly. She doesn’t even want me trying.
She is going to have a hell of a wake up call the very first night I am gone. It will be she who will have to stay up until 1:30 or even as late as 3 am doing the dishes. You can’t do the dishes until they are dirtied and three nights a week dinner starts around ten pm when the Kid returns from cram school. Can’t do dishes while someone is in the shower or bath as you’ll rob them of hot water so I can’t even begin to do dishes until after midnight. She’s about to discover just how “little” I do around the house.
It sure sounds like it is time to go! The kidney stone episode really made an impression on me.
I would have except for the kids. Then, after this there were wonderful times as a family again, so I held on to the hope we could right the capsizing ship that was our relationship.
Nope.