As you replied to my recent comment, the influence of his mother could be the key here. Your son might not be fully aware of this but at the same time on some level, maybe subconscious, he may worry about how his mother might react to him showing you any kind of affection. Either way, this is an important clue to his behaviour and might even lead to some kind of solution to the current situation.
I agree - something needs to happen to break the spell. For example, could it be arranged that you meet your son at a neutral location and then go on from there? When it’s time for him to go home, make sure you also part on neutral territory. Preferably as far away from home as practical. In the current circumstances you may need to be patient to wait for such an opportunity but you just have to have faith that it will happen if and when it’s meant to be.
In the meantime, do what you have already been doing and rebuild your life and do things you enjoy. Even if a positive outcome may seem highly unlikely right now, focus on the fact it still remains a possibility and avoid dwelling on things you have no control over.
Nothing I can do. He is not even opening my messages and his mother is not relaying anything between he and I. I asked his mother about dinner tomorrow night but have not heard back. I would like to take him to see Punch kun tomorrow morning and then have dinner with him too. But no reply from either. I am at the moment, looking at candidates for another solo hike tomorrow. If I do not get the go head for something with my son tomorrow by bed time tonight, I’m going hiking.
As you replied to my recent comment, the influence of his mother could be the key here. Your son might not be fully aware of this but at the same time on some level, maybe subconscious, he may worry about how his mother might react to him showing you any kind of affection. Either way, this is an important clue to his behaviour and might even lead to some kind of solution to the current situation.
Not as long as he continues to ignore me.
I agree - something needs to happen to break the spell. For example, could it be arranged that you meet your son at a neutral location and then go on from there? When it’s time for him to go home, make sure you also part on neutral territory. Preferably as far away from home as practical. In the current circumstances you may need to be patient to wait for such an opportunity but you just have to have faith that it will happen if and when it’s meant to be.
In the meantime, do what you have already been doing and rebuild your life and do things you enjoy. Even if a positive outcome may seem highly unlikely right now, focus on the fact it still remains a possibility and avoid dwelling on things you have no control over.
Nothing I can do. He is not even opening my messages and his mother is not relaying anything between he and I. I asked his mother about dinner tomorrow night but have not heard back. I would like to take him to see Punch kun tomorrow morning and then have dinner with him too. But no reply from either. I am at the moment, looking at candidates for another solo hike tomorrow. If I do not get the go head for something with my son tomorrow by bed time tonight, I’m going hiking.
I wish Substack had other options than “like” because I don’t like this at all.
I agree and “like” your comment.
Yeah, I know. I have adopted the idea that it means “agree” or “support” or more generally, “sending good vibes”.
Thanks.